Human Centipede 3
If you were (for whatever reason) somewhat entertained by the grotesque nature of the first two Human Centipede films, you might be inclined to check out the third – don’t. It offers little more than an hour and a half of screaming in broken English. It’s irritating, nonsensical, and not even that shocking. Do yourself a favor and pass this one up.

Plot Synopsis: Taking inspiration from The Human Centipede films, the warden of a notorious and troubled prison looks to create a 500-person human centipede as a solution to his problems

Diabolical
The Diabolical had a lot of things going for it. A talented director, a great cast, a fantastic premiere at SXSW, and super cool practical FX. Too bad it was marred by a convoluted story line and fairly horrible CGI. This one had all of the ingredients to make one hell of a horror cake, but there were just too many cooks in the kitchen… or something.

Plot Synopsis: When a single mother and her two young children are tormented by an increasingly strange and intense presence in their quiet suburban home, she turns to her scientist boyfriend to take on the violent forces that paranormal experts are too frightened to face.

Lazarus
It doesn’t get much more cookie-cutter than this, folks. Blumhouse may be known for some of the best theatrical horrors we’ve seen in recent memory, but they can churn out some stinkers too. The Lazarus Effect is one said stinker. Lazy filmmaking and storytelling make this one feel more like a made-for-tv movie than something worthy of a massive theatrical rollout.

Plot Synopsis: Medical researcher Frank, his fiancee Zoe and their team have achieved the impossible: they have found a way to revive the dead. After a successful, but unsanctioned, experiment on a lifeless animal, they are ready to make their work public. However, when their dean learns what they’ve done, he shuts them down. Zoe is killed during an attempt to recreate the experiment, leading Frank to test the process on her. Zoe is revived — but something evil is within her.

Mercy
Whenever I find myself displeased with how a movie plays out – I try my best to look at the positives. Unfortunately, there are very few positives to be found in Mercy. It’s one of the few occasions that I found myself angry while watching – and that’s never a good thing. Show yourself some mercy, and avoid this one at all costs.

Plot Synopsis: A single mom and her two boys help take care of their grandmother with mystical powers

Hellions
Hellions definitely looks the part. It has creepy character design, a nice Halloween backdrop, some uber-trippy visuals, and the power of an accomplished horror director behind it. It’s also completely illogical and horrendously paced. Hellions is trying its best to tell us something about abortion, choice, and teenage angst. What is it trying to say? I have no fucking idea, and I doubt you will either.

Plot Synopsis: A teen faces a night of terror when three malevolent trick-or-treaters come knocking at her door.

Mockingbird
A new movie from the guy behind The Strangers, and it has a creepy clown on the front! Awesome, right? Nope. This thing is a mess. And while it has some excellent sound design, the big reveal of the story is just… sucky.

Plot Synopsis: A couple are given a camera and a set of instructions which they must follow or else someone will die.

Bound
This is another unfortunate entry to the list. Bound to Vengeance opened at Sundance in 2014 to lukewarm reviews. Regardless, I went in with measured expectations. The concept is cool, and it’s a well shot film, but Bound to Vengeance is mostly pointless. Our leading lady’s quest for revenge is simply unnecessary. One illogical choice after another is made for practically no reason given how the film ends. Skip it – unless you just want to scream “CALL THE FUCKING COPS” at your TV for the duration of the film.

Plot Synopsis: A young woman, Eve, fights back and manages to escape a malicious abductor. However, after discovering she may not be the only victim, Eve unravels a darker truth and decides to turn the tables on her captor.

Nightmare
Praised as one of the most frightening documentaries of all time; i couldn’t wait to get my eyes on The Nightmare. As someone who loves documentaries (including this director’s previous work), I went in with high expectations. I left my viewing completely deflated. While you get various first-hand accounts of people that struggle with Night Terrors – there are basically zero ideas presented as to why this phenomenon occurs, and what makes people susceptible to it. The Nightmare serves up some cool eye candy, but fails as a documentary. Nothing to see here.

Plot Synopsis: Eight people experience sleep paralysis, a condition which leaves them unable to move, speak or react.

Ejecta
I know how bad you want an awesome new horror movie that centers around Aliens and UFOs – I want it too. Unfortunately, we continue to get one soulless experience after the other, and Ejecta is simply the latest in our well-established trend of mediocrity.

Plot Synopsis: Two men witness an unexplainable event in the sky as a historic solar storm approaches, and they try to survive as a terrifying life form hunts them.

When Animals Dream
Foreign horror is so much better than what we do in America – it can do no wrong. Okay, not really. But that’s certainly the sentiment of a lot of horror fans. In that regard, When Animals Dream serves an important role in the modern horror landscape; to prove that even filmmakers overseas can release some truly dreary and tedious horror. What’s worse? We don’t even get a chaotic or meaningful climax (which is typical in modern slow burn horrors). Having trouble sleeping? This one’s for you.

Plot Synopsis: The young woman, Marie, is an outsider in the small coastal community where she has grown up. The townspeople live in fear of her and not least her mother, who is wheelchair bound, suffering from a mysterious illness. When Marie discovers her body changing – long hair growing on her chest and back – she begins searching for answers concerning her family’s hidden past. Something that will have great consequences for herself and her family – and the choices she has to make.