I know what you're thinking....

Before I begin to whirl hurtful phrases and jokes, think about this – Gnome Alone is not the worst movie I have seen this year. Let that set in. Sure, it’s awful, but it’s also completely self aware. Unfortunately, being self aware isn’t always enough to produce good results.

I’m not entirely sure what it was that kept me from abandoning this film altogether, but there is something. Imagine the old school Leprechaun movies. Now make those way shitter in every way imaginable. Slap in a surprisingly capable leading lady (Kerry Knuppe) and Vern Troyer, and you have yourself Gnome Alone.

After you make your way through an eye-rolling introduction and comic book back story, you see that things may not be as bad as you expect. There are some legitimately good shots from time to time, and overall production value is quite good for a film titled…Gnome Alone. Even the score sounds like it was ripped right out of a 90’s B film. I think that may actually add to the films “charm”.. I’ll tell you what doesn’t – Vern Troyer. Practically every single one of his lines and scenes are cringe worthy,and not in the good way. It always comes off extremely awkward and creepy. Again, not in the good way.

It’s worth mentioning that I’m not one of those guys that’s into watching “bad” horror for the sake of some laughs. Comedy and horror should be mixed minimally, and it takes a very skilled team to deliver it in a way that I enjoy. That said, there are absolutely zero parts of Gnome Alone that are comical. So, if a movie isn’t scary… it’s not funny.. it doesn’t look great..and the acting is passable at best…what’s the point? I’m not sure I can answer that. What I can say is that something kept me seated and watching the entire time. I can’t explain it. Perhaps it was some of that good ol’ fashioned Gnome magic.